The Dark Side Takes Over Disneyland

Disney-Joins-The-Darkside-Opener

Image Source: http://gq.co.za/2015/08/new-disney-land/

ANAHEIM, CA-Disneyland being known as the “happiest place on earth” just became the “saddest place on earth”. During an interview with the CEO of Disneyland, they announced on Friday that they we will be closing the entire park for a long term Star Wars expansion. This expansion will take over 10 years to build and cause people to suffer while waiting another 5 years for another Star Wars movie. All five lands will be changed to: Force Land, Galaxyland, New Awaken Land, and Lightsaber Land which will sure give you a rotten time. Disneyland will be changing the name of many of your “favorite” rides such as: It’s a Dark World, Battlehorn, Millennium Cruise, and Death Star Mountain. We will be making your trip to Disneyland a tortureous one when we remove every Disney character and replace them with Star Wars characters who will attack you with lightsabers until you die. During your experience you will be able to have lightsaber battles (which will make you cry), have stormtroopers laugh at you for being a nerd, and kill the Jedi’s. Not only will you be able to fly and crash the Millennium Falcon, you will also be able to battle Darth Vader who ends up decpatating you after your final blow.  

 

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The Dark Side Takes Over Disneyland

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