The Final Countdown: Micromanaging Microwaves


In today’s advanced society, no one should have to face any injustice as serious as being unable to heat up their food after an incompetent “person” did not care enough to clear the remaining time after they stopped the microwave early. The act of stopping the microwave before it dings is relatively harmless, however, the issue reveals itself when the perpetrator does not clear the time left on the clock. Not only does this inconvenience the next user, but it actually wastes 30% more energy to leave the one second on the clock than to run the regular clock interface.  This great social injustice is the direct result of the impatience of the simple minded microwave operators whose lives are just too important to be inconvenienced for a single second longer. Not only is this trait a sign of mental weakness, it can also end perfect relationships through constant annoyance and a feeling of betrayal after one is constantly asked to stop. Because the premature termination of the microwave cycle is a direct result of one’s personality, there is nothing to do but watch them slowly spiral out of control, losing all their friends and loved ones, all because they couldn’t be bothered to wait one more second.

The Final Countdown: Micromanaging Microwaves

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