“Burn for a Cause”

English Satire Picture.jpg

As times change so do the measures and ideas we have to establish and create about how to live on this earth. With the constant problem of world hunger and poverty we as a nation have to do something about it. Too many people are dying every day in every part of the world. Even my own ancestors experienced some of the struggles of a lack of food. Because of this I feel an obligation to make some kind of difference in the world while I am alive. I, Muhtar Kent, the CEO of Coca Cola, am officially implementing the “Burn for a Cause Plan”. This plan will really amaze you about the process and how effective it can be. We Americans have way too much food to begin with. In fact, 40% of our food actually goes wasted anyways. On the other hand all the starving people in Africa, one of the biggest if not the biggest country in the world, who are struggling to make ends meet. Well do I have the solution for everyone. The Africans need to get moving to get their starving dying spirits up so what better way to do that then by forcing them to do labor. What kind of labor you might ask. Labor such as burning the excess food that America has. The leftover food that is still perfectly fine and edible has no use for us so we could just ship it to Africa and make them burn it. We will have to figure out what is the most cost effective way to transport the extra food but once we do it will be a nice process. Those dying Africans in their giant country, I really don’t know how with a country so big they are so poor, will feel satisfied that they were able to help America. Once all those people die off though from starvation because they do not have access to food, we will need to find something else to do with our perfectly edible food. I was thinking maybe ship it to the amigoes in South America, also a really big country if you ask me, and let them burn it. Support for this plan is through the roof. They see benefits for both sides.  For America and the Coca Cola company we get rid of our excess food and can feel good about ourselves that we are helping people in Africa get up and moving. This allows them to die of starvation with the thought that they are helping the world. We will also be sending care packages to the president of the prime minister, whatever the hell you call it in that country past the big lake in between us. By the way don’t take your kids to lake Lake. I think it’s called the Pacifier  or something and get this, it is hella salty. My son Kuhtar Ment started crying. But back to the task at hand, those care packages will be a nice add of to the “Burn for a Cause Plan”.From you America all I need is a simple donation. Think of it as you being apart of the next big thing in American history. I mean I know I want to be a proper noun in a kids essay 50 years from now. Maybe by that time they will realize how big Africa is and make it a continent. Call it “Big Africa”. In conclusion, the more work those starving people do the quicker they die. The quicker they die the less people on this earth. And who really cares about the lower class anyways. It’s time to get rid of the people who are bad for society and start focusing on the people who are trying to make a change, like me, Muhtar Kent. I am Muhtar Kent and I approve this article.

Advertisements
“Burn for a Cause”

2 thoughts on ““Burn for a Cause”

  1. BIGBOIDAVID says:

    This satire is very effective and brings light to all the starvation that goes on in the world and how the United States wastes a lot of food.
    One thing I loved was making the Africans burn the perfectly good food because it shows how wasteful the U.S. is and how much more we should be giving to Developing Countries. It also alludes to slavery.
    One thing to improve is to make sure the extreme sides are consistent and that you keep a central theme.

    Like

  2. ryanlovecamba says:

    1) I think this is a very effective satire it is obviously a fake plan and something that could never happen. It is a dark idea and makes us feel bad in the end.
    2)I love how you change names of obvious things like the pacific ocean calling it a big lake.
    3) I think you could improve on your tone, although your solution is dark I feel like it was a little to humorous.

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s