Cover up Ugly with Beauty From a Package
By: Disgust Grodie
I am a 15 year old teenager who hates my body, my personality, my life, and even my whole existence! I am just your typical depressed girl who struggles with looking ugly and feeling disgusting. Why did God put me here on this dreadful Earth of ugly women and flawless men? I just can’t take it any more! I have been put to the test, if you ask me. Women and teens just like me, might as well cover up their true ugliness with beauty that material desires can provide. It is so easy to go to Target and buy loads of makeup to look truly beautiful. I love sitting at my makeup table every morning and caking on 10 layers of foundation and then drawing my eyebrows on until they frame my face perfectly. Oh, and I can’t forget to wear loads of mascara to tame my ugly hairs that grow from my eyelids. Now clothing on the other hand, Forever 21 is a must have because that is what all the sexy, appealing women models are wearing nowadays. When I wear sexy clothing to school and around town people always tell me how pretty I am and how lucky I am to have such a great life. Well aren’t they jokester. They are so kind, telling me that I am beautiful, because in all reality they do not know how ugly I truly am deep down inside. If I did not have the amazing life savers, makeup and appealing clothing, I probably would be regarded as a street slum because I am so ugly.
Honestly, it is not worth it any more to go around without covering up the inner ugly that I project into the world. Makeup saves many people from being blinded by my hideous face. Let me ask you this: What do you think the boys at school think of girls when they see them without makeup or cute clothing? Well I can tell you straight up. They think those girls are pretty darn ugly! When us girls put on that layer of makeup, wear certain clothes, and act a certain way, it makes us truly beautiful. Thank God for beauty that comes in a package, otherwise I’d be doomed.
I get it. I am pretty ugly. Compared to everyone else I feel like I am the most grotesque girl in my class. My hair, my skin, my eyes, my teeth, heck, every single bone in my body is horrid. I wake up every morning and stare at myself in the mirror until I can find my true beauty, but it never happens. I cannot find my inner beauty because it does not exist and neither does it truly exist for any other woman in the world. Studies show that 78 percent of women have “love handles” and “chubby thighs”. I can’t believe that women are stuck with having such ugly features that we have to somehow cover up if we ever want to look appealing to the public.
Okay, so I have finally come to a conclusion about women. Statistics reveal that women only hold three percent of public jobs. This number is significantly low because the world obviously knows us women are truly hideous, disturbing human beings. On top of that, women are considered to be too emotional, letting feelings get in the way of their professional work. It’s surprising that no woman has ever thought of this reasoning before. Now everything is finally clear to me! Men are impeccable and women are disgusting creatures. Women could possibly pass as mediocre looking creatures, only if they try their hardest to look somewhat presentable. If you are a woman reading this article, please do your ugly-self a favor, buy some makeup or do something to cover up how disgusting you are!
Satire and The American Dream 
I really like your story and the real message you are portraying. Something you could improve on is making it more dark and twisted to make people cringe when they are reading it.
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