Chicken Rights? Chicken WRONG

Protests have emerged throughout the country over the striking issue of the treatment of chicken. Broiler Rights Activists have spread their message near and far, criticizing the selfish call for the rights of chicken by groups such as PETA. The BRA emphasizes the need for traditional treatment of chicken, and without it, America would consist of a bunch of vegan, animal-loving wimps, or chickens. This country has been founded on the success of food industries, no matter the cost. Almost everyone is a chicken consumer, so why break away from this way of life for the “fair” treatment of some minescule creatures, when you could have delicious fried chicken? Treating chicken like dirt works, and there are facts to prove it.

This traditional treatment, or mistreatment as the weak would call it, start at our friendly neighborhood farmers. Not only do they raise chicken traditionally for profit, but take extreme pleasure in their pain. In some circles, they call this sadism. During a recent interview, Farmer D. Beaker claimed, “ Not only is preparing a broiler chicken a means of making food, but it is an art. Your big daddies arrive at the slaughterhouse, plump and unwary of their demise. Once you approach with that knife, oh ho ho, it is one of the most exciting feelings in the world. Besides, who doesn’t like choking their chicken in public, am I right?” Obviously, no one would carry out such arduous tasks day and night without motivation. Broiler farmers raise and slaughter for our own satiation, their profit, and above all, their pleasure. It is a win-win situation, so why stop them?

Some believe the root of this controversy stems from the corporations. However, many throw harsh allegations at these companies without knowing any background information at all regarding their cause. Corporations, such as McDongos, only look for the best of the best broiler farmers. The McDongos rep, Roland, stated, “Only those who use top tier genetic modifications, and compact the most chicken in their growing houses, giving less than or equal to half a square foot of space, are even considered to be used for McDongos Chicken Nugs.” High standards show dedication to craft, and consideration of their product and its quality. Having these chicken go from broiler to food can even be compared to the Bushido code of Samurai. Living with these “necessary” rights is similar to the cowardice of retreating from war. However, sacrifice, and dying to become a top notch Chicken Nug brings honor.

Along with consideration of health, others look towards the statistics, and mass spending put in place for this industry. In 2015, 9 billion broilers were put into the market, 1.2 billion bushels of corn were used for feed, and $90 million dollars were used in consumer expenditure. An array of perspectives can view these numbers as an extreme waste of resources. However, these numbers mark milestones. We have come so far as a society, and there were times when 9 billion chicken did not exist, and corn had yet to be discovered. I bet there was even a time when $90 million dollars was not even in circulation. Bringing about these numbers demonstrate success within an industry.

To conclude, the push for a higher standard of living for chicken is unnecessary, and almost degrading. We should save ourselves from this embarrassing call to action. There is still a chance to redeem ourselves, and accept this productive reality. Aren’t there bigger problems in the world? Those who are agriculturally inclined should join the broiler farmer ranks, and help slaughter more chicken. This solves the issue of world hunger! Those of you who understand any bit of math could join the financial focused corporations. Taking advantage of the ever-flourishing chicken industry makes big bucks, and any bit of generosity can go to charities! Bam, that solves poverty. Oh the possibilities!

Chicken Rights? Chicken WRONG

This Addiction is Okay

Rather than parents giving their kids a tablet to play games when they need to be occupied, they hand their children books and puzzles to solve to increase their IQ. School have also changed for the best, instead of people using paper and pencil in english classes especially, we use strictly computers; who needs to know how to write and read cursive handwriting anymore? It isn’t like the computer is one of the biggest distraction ever invented. We don’t miss out on anything when we are focused on a device rather than what goes on around us. If you’re able to get hit by a car while walking across the street and you’re on your phone; you’re a great multitasker. It’s better to be addicted to your phone than other things that are bad for your health right.When you’re constantly reaching down to your pocket when you don’t have your phone but you thought you felt a vibration, is just you being aware don’t worry about it, it’s not like your body is telling you you’re in need.

When it comes down to it we won’t even have to be apart of the actual world, we have virtual worlds. Virtual worlds where we can have a fake wife or husband, and have fake kids that we don’t actually have to worry about. Parents with kids will just set there kids free, (which us kids always ask for) it’ll make us mature at a very young age; even as young as three months. Parents are going to enjoy virtual kids more then they do there own kids but that’s fine because it makes kids grow up faster if we do not die.

Don’t worry about using technology to escape from the real world, it’s significantly harder than it seems… To get a better sense of reality the internet is the place, if you want to become this social media rock star, and a complete loser in real life but nobody cares about being a known figure in real life anyways. You don’t even have to be your true self on social media, you can use pictures of others and start online relationships; being on catfish doesn’t sound too bad actually.

It’s not like technology is bad for you socially, mentally and physically. It’s not like technology has any benefits right now. Being aware of the lack of use of technology will soon make you realize technology can use a little a help, maybe more advertising to get it out there a little more. Isolation is key and without technology we can not isolate ourselves from the everyday world.Being isolated because living shorter lives, which is great  nobody likes living older than sixty years old. Who would need social skills anymore, when you can text your boss when you need something, face-to-face talk is very necessary, you can see how somebody feels with emojis you don’t need to be with them.

When people use technology not only do we isolate ourselves for the better but we become more observant of others and start cyberbullying more.Cyberbullying is better than bullying in person if you’re going to bully, cyberbullying is the way to go because you can delete whatever you put on the internet at any time you want, and it’s gone forever right?

Because of phones,we can now record everything that happens, from the meaningful moments, to the embarrassing moments. What’s the best to record though are fights. Instead of actually helping by trying to stop the fight or getting someone else to help,we can record because just incase anyone ask if were there and did we record we can show them all.We can even put it on the internet for everyone to see, which is the best part because people love to see fights on social media and you may get a bunch of “retweets” and become the boy/ girls known for the fight video all over the world.

This Addiction is Okay

Preserving the American Dream



One must acknowledge a great hero of the past century who ended racism, an individual who saw that things were not the way they should be, who fought to preserve the true ideals of the United States of America. The true heroes, the ones who noticed that the order was imbalanced and saw the way our society had strayed away from the very constitution that was meant to unite the rightful citizens of America.

That’s right folks, we’re talking about Lieutenant Nathan Bedford Forrest, the man who founded the Ku Klux Klan. He fought to preserve this nation the way it was intended: a white Protestant male empire without all the corruption of the Jews and the Indians and the blacks in power. By the people, for the people, with the people.

Despite the way we were persecuted, we persevered. We persevered, in honor of Thomas Jefferson’s dream of a white Protestant nation. After all, all white Protestant men are created equal. After all, everyone knows that Jefferson owned slaves, so how could he possibly mean them to be equal to us? We acted to preserve our rights, and now it is safe to say that white protestant men in society have found their place. It was naturally a difficult road. Many times we felt our security threatened…when the Japs bombed Pearl Harbor, we got in there, we defended ourselves, we made a better bomb then theirs and we showed them that we will fight to have our role in society. When Black Panther rose up, we beat down their terrorism, let them know that we could not be intimidated. How dare they act like they’re better than us. If they want our white Protestant rights, they can have our white Protestant piss.

We, the Ku Klux Klan did our part to end racism, and now I feel as though people will never take us, the straight white Protestant men, out of power. Think of the societal progress in the last 150 years about race. This is exactly when the Ku Klux Klan also came into power. We saw the plot of the Catholics in the 20s to put the pope before the president. Then, after the Jews caused the Great Depression, we fought against Hitler, proving that we as Americans were the better straight white Protestant males. When the communists tried to take over our country with lies about peace and love and happiness, trying to take away our status, we were ready. We were the ones behind the police pouring tear gas on them hippies. We were the ones in Vietnam, enforcing the law of the jungle. We sent them gooks on the run, and kicked the commies on with them. We were the ones that fought the women’s liberation movement, ensuring nobody challenges our status in society. The same goes for Martin Luther King. We were the ones who threatened him, and yes, we were the ones who killed him.

And obviously, there are still threats to our well-being. After all, here we are, militantly establishing a unified nation ruled by the one, true, God, and suddenly the Muslims come out of nowhere, preaching whatever it is they believe. However, our unified nation has backup. For example, who would have ever predicted that we know have both major political parties on our side. We have the Democrats who founded us, as well as the Republicans who agree with us. Just look at all the straight white male Protestants in positions of power today! If he could see this, Jefferson would have wept tears of joy at what our nation has evolved to.

All of this, we achieved, simply because, our status cannot be challenged. So yes, bow to us, salute us, for the Ku Klux Klan ended racism. You’re welcome. We will win, because, this is America. And, of course, we must thank you. Thanks to your ignorance, your apathy, and your myopia, we will make America great again.

Preserving the American Dream

Television Rules the Nation

I do not have as much motivation as you think when I plant my butt firmly on your living room couch. I do not tend to listen to anything but the words that come out of that metal box that you have purchased for our family on Christmas 3 years ago, so do not get mad at your 6th-grade son when you say that the volume is way too loud on this machine. But not only do I have the power to change what show I want to watch, or what channel I want to be on, I also have the power to hit the On Demand button on my remote, and out pops a list of all the latest viewings you would never let me watch. Heck, you won’t even see the money coming out of your pocket the next couple of weeks, or months depending on your attention span. So I’m praying to god that you worry more about your family life problems while your 6th-grade son again sits here and become addicted to this machine is known as Television.

You will take notice that this habit of watching Television will start to become more dangerous to my family and my health in various ways. You will take note that every day I get home from school to watch TV, this throbbing headache of mine starts to get worse and worse for me. Not only that but as you look at my grades and constantly begin shouting at me like I’m supposed to listen to you. I have lost my motivation in schoolwork, and almost everything but Television. Now instead of focusing what events are going to pop up, I’m more focused about not watching another Simpsons rerun. I won’t keep in mind that it will get worse and worse every day since I barely step outside anymore; watching about 71 hours of television a week. I don’t realize that I’m slowly reducing the amount of time I have left to live, and I’m literally killing myself by sitting on my own ass. Very soon the very spot that you see that I sit on will begin to spring roots underneath the earth, making sure that whatever wind comes by, you will always remain seated.

6 months after you surrender, you realize that I do nothing but TV every day after school, and you are beginning to understand what it is like to feel isolated from the people you care about. It has never crossed your mind that those days that I have spent most of my time watching that TV in the living room, I was being constantly exposed to negative behavior that is way too mature for kids my age. Influenced by these adult TV shows, you begin to become suspicious of me when I use adult language behind your backs, and you haven’t had the slightest clue on where I’m getting this from. Take this as a lesson when you don’t watch your 7th-grade son whose fist-fights in schools turn into knives, then into expulsion. You had no problem hitting the roof at that time, and you wonder why I did that as I sat in the police car with my handcuffs on. You cry with your husband and my siblings, sinking into a great depression.

The day you see me enter that hall for bad teens after that failed trial, you motion to set a better example for your family as you shove that TV into the living room balcony. Heh, funny; try influencing the other 7 billion people on the planet to do the same, because that is how murder, assault, and rape affect the minds of this world. Television can’t make you do it, but it can influence you too. Do me a favor: Go explain this story to my brother, and title it “Television Rules the Nation.” He’d kill to hear the end of it.

Television Rules the Nation

The Beauty Pageant Life

Hi! My name is Holly Smith, but people call me Sugar Kiss. I may be six, but I have the body of a twenty-year-old woman. I’m the sexiest beauty pageant woman, and I know it, because the judges tell me so. They love it when I hit the stage and do my “Booty Pop” twirk dance. My pole-dancing instructor says I’m a natural. I practice at the studio everyday from six in the morning to twelve in the afternoon. Mother keeps me in check. Whenever I complain she just yells and slaps me straight again. “Just do what your told and be pretty,” or “No pain, no gain”, is something she always says. Of course she’s right. I don’t want to end up like Emma Johnson. She was once proudly known as Midnight Kitty because of her flexible body that men craved during her nighttime jobs. Her red and pink hearts tattooed in the corner of her eyes were her trademarks. Judges loved her! She inspired my mother to put me on the ‘scarf and barf’ diet in order to maintain a perfect skinny body. But now Emma is worthless.

I didn’t hear the whole story on what happened, but apparently she was tricked into wearing a plain dress that covered her body, with no make up and wig. Emma stopped going to her daily plastic surgery appointments because she “wants to accept herself for who she is?” (I know, she’s so gone in the head) Worst of all, she spoke her mind at one of her pageants, “I am an eight year old girl and I want to dress like one” she said. As you can imagine, she immediately lost everything and everyone. I too lost my respect for her.

I heard one of those ugly little fat girls, who go to school, forced her way into Emma’s home one night and brainwashed her into believing that her body wasn’t all that mattered. She lost her values on who she should be in order to gain the acceptance and approval of others. And when the mental damage was done, the ugly girl left. I never heard of Midnight Kitty again. One time I thought I saw what looked like a bald girl with a large overgrown coat begging for money and makeup on the streets. I could have sworn she had tattooed red and pink hearts in the corner of her eyes.

I think one of the pageant girls wanted her gone and paid the fatty to do what she did to Emma. I wouldn’t be surprised in the least. We all want to win and be crowned the most beautiful. To be honest, I’m overjoyed Midnight Kitty is out of the way. It makes being the prettiest a lot easier for me!

The Beauty Pageant Life

The Useless Runts of America vs The Efficient Machines

Who needs people anymore? We have intelligent, multitasking robots that can do everything 100 times better than any human could. The increase of joblessness in North America is beneficial for those lazy citizens, so we can see witness families starve, be kicked out of there houses and catch diseases, and die. Who cares if their family dies, it’s an advantage to our over population and homeless dilemma. Robots don’t need food, don’t have to pay them, don’t have to need days off, and if they break down, they are quickly and easily replaceable. If we ask ourselves why technology, high-developed tools and machines were created, what would be your answer? I would argue to get rid of the futile, lethargic humans that waste the oxygen needed for the relevant businessmen. The only ones we need are those extremely sophisticated engineers, mechanics, businessmen/ CEO’s, and any other creator’s of these magnificent machines that will surely fix the work industry. Other than that, humans don’t have any use on this planet, so like I said, why does it matter if they die? They are as useless as ants.

You think I’m joking about humans being as useless as ants?

Ants have no strength at all. Humans aren’t any different. Machines are like hulk. They can be ginormous or as small as an ant, but it will always be significantly stronger than that teensy weak ant. This is an ant vs. Hulk scenario where hulk will always be the overpowering matter will always be successful. Also, the precision of robots and machines superior than humans because they tend to be more stiff and still when doing work        than human hands.

Not to mention, humans are so querulous and whiney. Humans are just overgrown babies, since they complain as much as them. Robots will get their jobs done, no complains guaranteed. You have enough stress and responsibly, so lets just cut out the irrelevant people out of the picture and run them out of the world. If they try to refuse ending their insignificant life, good thing we have machines to do our dirty work for us that will mash them into a pile of blood and guts onto the floor and leave the spot sparkly clean as if nothing ever happened. Speaking of dirty work, the stuff humans don’t want to do or are too dangerous for them to accomplish could finally be done without worrying about the safety or complaints from the human.

You know why else humans are horrible and rotten? Humans will betray your word and have the ability to somehow ruin you until you are nothing. They will try to take your powerful position from you because humans are very untrustworthy. They also carry emotions that will corrupt your business. How so? When humans get angry, lasers will launch from their eyes. They will explode with rage, and your business will physically go down. When they cry, they take away your productive time just so they have your focus. Humans are selfish and always try to take away your power and success. Is that enough evidence that humans are destructive to the success of our work industries?

Robots will always get their jobs done, no complains guaranteed.  I know you have a lot of responsibilities and work that needs to be done, so getting rid of these runts that prevent our work industry from being progressive and agile. So if I needed to invest my money on something productive and worthwhile, I’d spend it on buying a machine. If I were an executive boss, I would not waste anymore time and for the benefit of my company, replace every unnecessary worker with a robot or machine. Getting rid of these disgusting, waste of space is crucial. Robots and machines is the answer to the fixing the joblessness increase in America.

The Useless Runts of America vs The Efficient Machines

Let my Blood pump…

No one understands what I feel. No one understands on what it feels like to feel happy about being drugged to feel no pain, about being touched inappropriately by the workers, and the exhilaration of being strapped to tables. EVERY SINGLE DAY felt like the best day of my life. My life was boring before the asylums, I mean I stayed in a room, I was taken care of by my parents, and I was given love. But no, I didn’t want love and I didn’t want pity. I wanted horror and I wanted a life that was so dangerous that my body and mind would be broken into tiny little pieces so I can’t function as a normal being but as a psychopath as everyone calls me.

I wanted the feeling of straps strapping me so tight over my skin, I wanted to feel the pain of my skin growing over the rusty leather straps but that’s only when I want to feel just pain. No, real pain itself was when I was put into a straitjacket and locked into a room with my suicidal thoughts. How is that real pain? Well, it’s because every single time that I’m alone in that isolated room, where I’m away from reality, where my mind can think whatever it wants because it’s just me and nobody else. Just me in a small room where I can scream, hit my head against the walls, force myself to go numb, and just lose myself to thoughts that nobody can interpret but myself and only myself. Maybe that’s why normal people don’t understand because they don’t want to lose themselves into a world of drugs, of abuse, and of losing one’s soul and dignity.

Oh but do you want to know what gets my blood pumping? The doctors and the nurses. You may think that they are all goody two shoes but don’t ever believe what normal people tell you. Believe what the mentally insane say because we have the best experiences with them. The Doctors are possibly the best. These doctors touch you in such inappropriate ways that you feel goosebumps from the pleasure. Sometimes, they even have sex with you and you blood just starts to pump when their belt just hits the ground. Their rough hands touching my skin, the way that they tackle me to the ground just so I could take my meds so I can overdose makes me feel alive. Nobody knows this except now but these doctors are the ones that made me felt more alive than I ever felt before. And the nurses? Oh don’t get me started on those nurses. They are the best employees you ever had. I mean the drama that goes on with them? They start to cheat on their husbands to fuck the any of the doctors but then commit suicide once they find out they are pregnant and nobody wants them, I mean who could want anyone better? The nurses never take care of us which allows us to roam free and disturb the peace in the neighborhood when we sneak out of the building. The only time they care for us is when they force feed us, which I have to say is possibly the greatest idea that’s been ever invented but that’s just me.

What I’m really trying to propose to everyone is that mental hospitals shouldn’t exist. We shouldn’t even be living in proper homes. People that have Chronic Dementia, Acute Mania, or Melancholia have to be isolated from the normal people because we can’t live with you normal people. We are the mentally insane, the psychopaths, the cannibals and no one wants to live with that ever. But if you can raise and protect someone who is close to you that have those diseases by all means take care of them. But just know that you are at risk of being injured or at worst killed.

Let my Blood pump…